moodiful819

Professional Jellyfish

Posts tagged shakespeare

6,561 notes

ghost:
hamlet your uncle killed me so can you kill him
hamlet:
sure dad i'm on it
hamlet:
(acts strangely)
hamlet:
(writes part of a play)
hamlet:
(kills the wrong guy)
ghost:
jfc son just kill him already
hamlet:
okay okay fine i'll do it
hamlet:
(gets kidnapped by pirates)

Filed under shakespeare JESSICA LOOK AT THIS accurate

255,841 notes

arrafrost:

hopeyou-findthatswimmingpool:

I’m writing a modern version of Romeo and Juliet for english class and I’m making them dumb teenagers like they should be and I thought tumblr might appreciate some excerpts from my planning document

image

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Oh yeah and romeo’s going to be sulking about rosaline friendzoning him at the start

I’m really trying to emphasise the ‘stupid kids’ thing here

Six people are dead

(via jampelock)

Filed under shakespeare JESSICA LOOK AT THIS Lit-nerding cannot. CANNOT

312,166 notes

Summary of Romeo and Juliet

romeo:
im so sad
romeo:
ill never be happy
romeo:
a party sure why not ill just sulk around an- WOAH
romeo:
WHO DAT
romeo:
SHE GOT DA BOOTY
romeo:
imma dance with her
romeo:
*dancin wit teh juliet*
juliet:
dafuq are you
romeo:
shh *kiss*
juliet:
:oo
*party over*
romeo:
AYYY LOOK I FOUND DAT LADY'S HOUSE
romeo:
LADY
romeo:
HEY LADY
juliet:
OMG HI I REMEMBER YOU
romeo:
yeah its me hey wanna get married
juliet:
dont you think its too soon
romeo:
idk
juliet:
brb
romeo:
k
juliet:
HEY YEAH LETS GET MARRIED TOMORROW
romeo:
AWW YEAH I BET THIS PUTS ME ABOVE MERCUTIO AND BENVOLIO IN MAN POINTS
*next day*
rome and juli:
FRIAR MARRY US PLEASE:
friar:
idk and ROMEO WEREN'T YOU JUST SULKING OVER ROSALINE LIKE YESTERDAY
romeo:
yeh
friar:
ok fine ur married
rome and juli:
yaaaay
*some time later*
tybalt:
WELL SLAP MY BUTTOCKS AND CALL ME A MONTAGUE IS THAT ROMEO
mercutio:
excuse you dont talk bout my friend like that
tybalt:
shut up mercutio *stab*
mercutio:
WAAHAHAH IM DED *he die*
romeo:
hnnn
tybalt:
....
romeo HNNN
tybalt:
...
romeo:
hnnnHIYAAAA *stab*
tybalt:
oH NO IM DED AHH *he die too*
prince:
ohmygod why did i JUST tell you yesterday about fighting
romeo:
i sorry
prince:
no ur banished
romeo:
HWWHWHHAAAT YOU BANBISHED ME
romeo:
*runs to friar* IMMA KILL MYSELF*
friar:
no i have plan just go to mantua ok
romeo:
k *leaves*
juliet:
FRIAR HELP THE LOVE OF MY LIFE THAT I KNEW FOR LIKE 1 DAY JUST GOT BANISHED IMMA KILL MYSELF
friar:
NO JULIET I HAVE A PLAN you drink this potion you look dead you be put in capulet tomb until you wake up and romeo find you and you run away together
juliet:
ok
juliet:
*goes home and drinks potion*
nurse:
hey juliet rise and shi- OOOH MY GOD LADY CAPULET COME HERE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
lady capulet:
wha- OH NOO OH NO okay lets throw her in the tomb of dead people
nurse:
k
juliet:
*in da tomb* zzZzzZZzzzZ *not actually dead just sleepin*
romeo's servant:
AYY YOO ROMEO I GOTS NEWS FOR YA
romeo's servant:
JULIET'S DEAD
romeo:
WHAT
romeo:
WHAaaAaaaT
romeo:
OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA GO AHEAD AND POISON MYSELF BEFORE LOOKING INTO THE SITUATION AT ALL OR CONTACTING THE FRIAR OR ANYTHING
romeo:
*buys potion*
romeo:
*breaks into the tomb of dead capulet people*
romeo:
oh my god its juliet wow she doesn't even look dead
romeo:
but im sure she is
romeo:
*kiss juliet*
romeo:
*drinks poison*
romeo:
he ded
juliet:
*yawning* YAWWWN oh i can't wait to see my rome- WHAT DAFUQ
juliet:
IT'S ROMEO NEXT TO ME
juliet:
HE DED
juliet:
*grabs sword and stabs herself*
oh yeah and romeo also killed Paris in the tomb by the way forgot to add that b/c apparently killing tybalt wasn't enough
friar:
*comes in cell*
friar:
uh oh
prince:
WHAT DIS
CAPULET:
WHAT DIS
LADY CAPULET:
WHAT DIS
MONTAGUE:
WHAT DIS
CApULET:
*strokes montagues face* brother

Filed under shakespeare Lit-nerding

186,624 notes

So, my friend is stage managing Macbeth and made this status today…

nottoooldfordisney:

fuckingmultiverse:

letsgivethesekidsashow:

honeychildplease:

image

I’m quite pleased with this.

Rapping this out loud in my empty classroom like swag.

WALK INTO THE CLUB LIKE WADDUP I AM A BIG SCOT

I’M SO PUMPED ABOUT SOME VISION THAT THE WITCHES GOT

I WILL BE THANE, SO SAYS THE PROPHECY

THAT PEOPLE LIKE “DAMN, MACBETH DESERVES GLORY”

macklebeth

(via silverlight70)

Filed under cannot. CANNOT shakespeare JESSICA LOOK AT THIS Lit-nerding